Mustard Chops

These pork chops will, without a question of doubt, BLOW YOUR MIND. I know my tongue was running on all cylinders trying to keep up with 'em. from a distance they seem to be your standard fried pork chop right? WRONG! the bread crumbs are held into place with dijon mustard, instead of egg n flour. YEP... serious as a hark-attack. super simple: dump chop in mustard - dump chop in crumb - dump chop in baking dish w/ olive oil - dump chop into gut. 

eating these jobs is just a plain blur... you'll remember bits and pieces of the experience but it'll all come back to ya when you fall asleep that night and dream your flying a pork chop magic carpet through space wearing a mustard stained '74 Rolling Stones concert t-shirt. DO IT!

oh....and yes i like a little mashed potatoes w/ my butter.

"eat the mush...shut the pie-hole"

i promise i won't post very many vid clips on the tastemachine cause they annoy da hell outta me too, but i found a couple on my best friend www.hulu.com (shameless plug i know but i don't make enough dough to fight a NBC Universal lawsuit) that fit perfect on the machine. hope you find them as amusing as i did.

Meat is the new Bread!

this is EXACTLY what i'm talkin' bout people!!

Pot O' GOLD!

Don't steal his lucky charms.

or you shall be pinched by these tiny pincers

Tiny Pizzas..... not so tiny hands

Suz has gotten excellent at making these tiny pizzas.... Digorno and Freschetta and their frozen dough no more!

Pita, organic tomato paste and or pesto..... and whatever else you'd fancy on a thin pie. Here, broccoli, black olives, feta, parmy and bananna peppers.... a mediterranean fusion mess that hits the spot. I eat two in one sitting.

Black Dog

Grilled Sabrett Dogs, home-made hand chopped slaw (pickle juice is the secret) and 2 hour baked beans. Summer is upon us, even though we (Suz& Mr. Wizard) made this about a month ago. Preserved for eternity in my camera until now. Don't hate on the Miller Lite--it's delish with a blackened dog.

Go Green

dudes, this dish would have Ed Begley Jr shoutin' "AL GORE" naked from the rooftops. 

on your left is a load of pesto pasta with some wicked shimps i sauteed in a lump of butter n threw some pesto on 'em at the last second. (alright i've never been one to go fishin' in the frozen food section for crustaceans but they had a blue light special on these babies so i grabbed a bag....let's just say sometimes risks DO come with rewards). 

then i move my fork over to the right and get hit with an unbelievable asparagus recipe straight outta Salem, Oregon. steamed then sauteed w/ parmesan cheese to nearly crunchy. WOW!

this was one of the richest meals i've devoured in a good bit (...and by rich i mean heavy and by heavy i mean delicious and by delicious i mean i ate 'til i my belly button 'bout came untied). guess i need to save the planet more often.

Bacon-ators Unite

Alright folks i've been blessed with some very precious things throughout my life (like my wife, a cool house, http://www.hulu.com/, etc.) but this new discovery just may be the holy grail of taste. that's right, the key to unlock taste buds you didn't even know you had in that pie hole of yours. Ladies and Gentlemen...i give you...

BACONSALT

(http://www.baconsalt.com/, http://www.baconsaltblog.com/)

Go check this stuff out...sounds AMAZING. Some cherished soul has finally cracked the chastity belt of artificial swine and stuffed bacon in a bottle to be SPRINKLED over anything and everything...i pray that it tastes as great as it sounds.

Thanks to "mya-mya" for raising the red flag on this potential life altering product. If anyone get's there dirty little mits on this pig powder before i do, let me know (IMMEDIATELY!!).

Tasty Hot American Summer

It doesn't get much better than soilin' yourself in beers while 

standing in a neat circle around a smokin' grill...a.k.a Summertime. and you don't need to tell the TasteMachine crew when the seasons change. 

Needless to say, these Kabobs had people movin' n shakin'. when the red meat hit the table in was ON! like a scene straight outta Nat. Geo...so good.

J.P.'s "guacamole salad" was a magnificent complement to the meat n veg. trust me when i say it's good to be such good friends w/ a guac god. 

Killin' it.

Mr. Wizard on his 7th slice of grilled squash.

and this sums up the entire day after for me. Yep, another knockout meal straight into the gut.

My Only Offer

Ahh... the greatness that is Memorial Day weekend. Let me tell you folks that this was a group effort a-la Wild Hogs weekend that came together like gang busters.

First up were some jalap poppers courtesy of Big Baby Jesus (aka S. Horner). These irresistible bastards were stuffed with fresh rosemary and cream cheese before being wrapped in god's gift to the human race, sweet sweet bacon. Grilled to perfection these tiny guys disappeared faster than the lighter fluid out of Gob's shirt. 

For the ridiculous main meal I put together a guacamole salad with a chipotle sauce that just about made me cry like a woman watching Steel Magnolias. We covered that up with some hefty kabobs stuffed with all your fav meats and veggies. Mr. Wizard threw some fresh squash in the mix and the meal was complete.

Too bad we all passed out by 11 or it could have been a crazy night. Thanks scotch, thanks a lot.

Kudos go out to the Horner's for hosting, to my iphone for snapping some pics, Mr. Wizard for his beautiful flask, and to Jason for bringing some sort of heavenly dip that I cannot even begin to explain. 

Here's a song we blasted a good part of the night!

"My Only Offer" by Mates Of State from the album Re-Arrange Us