"Well I’m not the world’s most physical guy..."

been a while T-Machine. How ya doing old friend!! got a couple goodies from our vaca back to the evergreen state. Lola is a little joint in Seattle, apparently owned by some dude that challenged the Iron Chefs...he probably lost but i won't hold that against him.

in typical "can't risk it" fashion i went with the burger...no fair thinking out of the box and trying something new on vacation right? actually i walked the tightrope a little with this kid seeing how it was a "lamb" burger. grilled veg...pretty amazing. and what u ask is that pile of Lincoln Logs to the right of the burger volcano?....well...let's just say if this were a plate of Destiny's Child, logs = Beyonce....CHICKPEA FRIES!!!

i was fit to be tied by these works of art. they looked and felt like a Gorton's fishstick (which i would have had absolutely no problem with because they rock too) but after biting into it and discovering a creamy chickpea filling, all my great memories associated with fishsticks vanished. so amazing, probably the tastiest thing i've ever eaten in stick form. a ginger dipping sauce accompanied the fries but it played second fiddle for sure. i know now how Lewis and Clark felt upon discovering the Columbia River...very pleased and a little wet.

mrs. horner rocked some chicken kabobs w/ homemade pita bread and as she put it "the best mo' foin' potatoes EVER!" (hey...her words not mine). they were called garlic smashed potatoes. we put our heads together and came to the conclusion they must have baked them, hit them with a sledgehammer and then deep fried them...genius. did i have a bite? uh...yes. 

for desert the good sir waiting on us made a special run to heaven and came back with a bag of petite donuts. coated in pure sugar, milled by a family from a small village on the coast of peru and imported directly to the restaurant daily by bike messenger (not really...just added for effect. sugar is sugar kids.). topped it with a dollop of sweet mascarpone and a rhubarb gel i wanted to do a cannonball into. hit the spot fo' sho'. 

excellent meal all around and a well deserved break from watching nicci and jackie beat the streets on a downtown seattle shopping spree. "women be SHOPPIN'...you can't STOP a woman from shoppin!"

on the Dusty trail

Dusty Burgers located in wenatchee which is conveniently located on our way to seattle. just a down and dirty burger n shake shack. been there forever and has played a vital role in me becoming the man i am today. this trip i called upon the double meat, double cheese, no onions monster to slug me in the gut. if i ever start an indie electro-pop/alternative/glam-rock/folk band it will be called "DMDC no onion". stay tuned.

that 16 year old wizard behind the grill will throw on as many patties as you can handle at this place. the record for a sittin is well over 25...little excessive but who am i Jack Lalanne over here? all i know is when you see cheese wrinkle under the weight of meat like that...IT'S GO TIME! i was a little hesitant to surpass the double mark cause i had a 2 hour drive in front of me...no further explanation needed to this group.

mrs. H slammed the single meat n cheese...pussy. hahaha, she actually pounded more fries than me so she put in a solid performance. oh and no this photo was not staged, a mere candid shot that just so happened to capture the essence of the environment in which taken.

MUSTARD TIGER!

My Latest Find and attempt....

Have to admit, no juicy photo to accompany this post, but this is my latest work in progress:

http://cookandeat.com/2006/10/31/trick-or-treat-dark-chocolate-martini/

cookandeat.com is a site that appears to marry delicious, involved recipes with fantastic photography.... maybe we are in for a buy out.

ALL ABOARD THE MEAT WAGON!

This has got to be one of the most grisly things I've ever seen. An old ambulance converted to a BBQ catering rig, called 'The Meat Wagon". Awesome.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TAYLOR!!

Taylor's 20th at the Breadline. Scarfed up the Shrimp Alfredo at a pretty good clip. Paula topped his night off with a huge slice of Black Forest Cake ala whipped cream and black cherry swirls. Mya couldn't eat the top sirloin fast enough. Said it was so tender she really didn't need to bother chewing it anyway.

Hotter Than A Pepper Sprout!

Sometimes it's amazing what you can conjure up when alone and 'bach-in' it. Needed something in my system other than McD's Big 'n Tasty and Salted Nut Rolls. Decided to muster up one of my old favorites. Browned some burger, mixed it with some Spanish Rice-a-Roni, added some diced tomatoes, crammed it all into a hollered out pepper, baked for awhile, topped it off with a little mozzerella, big ol' splash of tabasco....it was pretty damned good! The next night leftovers were even better.

Dude's Night In.

Tough times call for bargains in the kitchen. Take the often overlook Top Round Roast. Some call it a London Broil; which is a snootier sounding name because it's Euro and Broiled..... I, on the other hand just call it a roast. This was a clearance roast from Food Lion I threw in the freezer until Sat Morning..... thawed it in the sink along with some other bacon scraps i dug out of the freezer. The Rub It. Any Dry Rub..... I used some of Uncle John's spices--- it was a mix of your standard rubbing spices: salt, garlic, onion, pepper, cayenne, and something called chardex which J pIe thinks is a product of something charred. Just to be sure the rub didn't fall off, i slapped some of those bacon strips on it.... then i wrapped it in saran and threw it in the fridge for an hour or so......

Bake at 400, uncovered in a roasting pan... if you've got a rack (and not the female kind) you could use that but i don't and i didn't. Flip it after 25 minutes..... roast another 20 and check it.... My meat thermometer read 125 which is what i read online somewhere was for medium.... this was a little more done than medium but not terribly so...... Tent with foil for 15 mins or long enough to bake some steak fries---again a bargain from Food Lion. Oh I should mention this was for a 2.5 lb roast. J-Pie's tiny hand is shown here for size comparisons.

Someone (i.e. the interwebs) once told me the trick to London Broil was the way you slice it.... I'm not certain I got it down yet but i cut across the grain into strips.... this is where you discern the roast from the steak.... sliced on your plate when its time to eat, as opposed to delivering it to you with a steak knife.

Some other side dishes that came out of this endeavor:

1. the tasty oven roasted and beef juice marinated bacon strips.... J-pie couldn't help himself......

2. Meat shots. All that delicious meaty juice shouldn't go to waste. However, it was a little too much for us up there on 2 legs. Jake on the other hand was very appreciative.

The best part---- I've got tasty roast beef strips for sandwiches all week..... Today I nuked 4 strips and put it on a sammy with CoJack, romaine and spicy mustard...... daily heaven.

NEWS you can actually use.....

We all know how the media wears us out with their persistent updates on pointless issues of the day: Brangelina, Your 401k/retirement/stock portfolio going to shyte, McPalin v. O-Biden, Joe the Stripper........... etc.........

Here's a fresh site giving you the lowdown on a perennial TasteMachine fave:
http://bacontoday.com/

Sweatpants Not Included

The '08 T-Machine Summit brought together a distinguished group of taste vetrans that flat out know how to play the game. It was kinda like the Last Supper only we replaced bread and fish w/ bacon and dips...i'm guessing that the wine consumption was probably consistant though.

The Summit kicked off w/ a little fireworks. Mama Machine lost control of the blender while mixin' up her red pepper cheese dip. it was so good i think we used tortilla chips instead of paper towels to clean it up.

As the festival wore on we ditched all electical devices and fired up the grill. I went with the standard procedure of grillin' about 50 Jalap Poppers. Laucher-5000 flew in some Lamb chops that were doused with some ridiculous mid-eastern sweet rub. They...were...awesome.

Eyes grew wide as the feast drew closer.

I present to you....the BACON BOWL. J.P.izza built these tasty bitches. Kind of ironic that we stuffed health into the most unhealthy invention since the McGriddle, but "delicious" knows no boundries.

We didn't get off the gas after the salad course. That's right more swine peeps. Papa Machine slaved all day on the short ribs. Boiled, beat w/ spice rub n brushed w/ bbq sauce. sweet christ they were good. Meat fell of the bone while i fell off my chair.

Pizza went solo on desert. She whipped up some hearty (yet quite delicate) cream puffs. i detected a slight twing of almond while poppin' 3 down my throat. they were a nice topping to the load already percalating in all our guts.

Anticipation is the most delicious falvor

Tomorrow marks the first Tastemachine Southeasterrn Convention. Fire up your salivary glands and whip out the wasabi. The thrills the chills the spills.

The blogosphere is abuzz with the tastes on tap: The early buzz is:

cow pig lamb

bean cheese

air.


Stay tuned for more details.....